Declaration of Emergency Leave Due to Sudden Onset of Sudden-Itchy Syndrome (SOSS)

Submitted by: John Doe, Department of Absurdly Unlikely Excuses

I, John Doe, hereby declare that I am currently suffering from a sudden and mysterious case of Sudden-Itchy Syndrome (SOSS), a affliction of the skin that has left me in a state of utmost discomfort and itchiness.

As a result, I am compelled to take emergency leave from my duties and seek solace in a series of intensive itchy-scratching sessions.

I request that my colleagues and superiors be understanding of my temporary absence, as I am sure that with the aid of copious amounts of calamine lotion and a team of highly trained itchy-surgeons, I shall be back to my usual self in no time.

Thank you for your understanding and support.

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Support Group for Sudden-Itchy Syndrome Sufferers

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